I’ve thought about what I would say all day, but I’m still at a loss. I have feelings and tears and words but nothing that truly expresses the loss I feel.
I wasn’t always a feminist. For years I made jokes against feminism. I wanted to be the cool girl, you know the one who isn’t like the other girls. This is ridiculous considering how much makeup I wore and all the dresses I owned. I was never cool, but I wanted to pretend I was to win the unspoken competition among girls. There was a time where I even said a woman couldn’t be president because she would be too emotional. I am not proud.
Something happened as I grew stronger. This happened as my faith in God grew and I surrounded myself with empowering female friendships. I began to see how sexist the world was and how much I had to unlearn. I grew into a feminist not to be a radical or burn my bra, but to fight for a better world for girls. One where ‘like a girl’ is empowering and rape culture doesn’t exist.
Now it’s a point of contention with my parents. They don’t see the same problem. Trump’s views on women don’t enrage them. My mom is worried my feminism will replace my faith in God. I would laugh if I wasn’t too busy crying at the state of our nation. They agree to let me respectfully point out when they’re being sexist, but long for a world before political correctness. I try and explain it isn’t about that, but they don’t understand.
I tell them I wish Trump’s views on women bothered them more, and my mom tells me there are more important things than feminism. Perhaps, but when your daughter is crying because her parents don’t see the inequality, these words are little comfort.
I believe another woman could’ve been elected over Hillary, but I won’t say with 100 percent confidence this nation is ready with open arms for a female leader. I think she was put under a closer microscope because sometimes we’re more misogynistic than we think.
My parents told me to stop taking it so personal as I cried about having to call a man my president when he doesn’t respect me or many of my friends. I don’t understand how this isn’t personal.
As a Christian, I know I must pray for our nation and president and I will because I want to succeed and continue to be a great nation. So I will. I know God is still in control and it will work out big picture. I realize Donald Trump will hopefully surround himself with people who understand how to run a nation and we will most likely make it through the next four years even if they’re terrible. I know it will be ok.
But tonight I will cry because we had the chance to make history and we missed it. I will cry because my parents don’t see the same world I envision and that makes me sad. I will cry for all the parents who have to explain what we’ve done to ourselves.
I will cry because sometimes that’s all you can do.